“We will get there, heaven knows how we will get there. We know we will. It will be hard we know, and the road will be muddy and rough, but we’ll get there, heaven knows how we will get there. We know we will”.
Title song from the album Woyaya by the Ghanaian-Afro Pop band Osibisa (1971) and later performed by Art Garfunkel in his debut solo album, Angel Clare (1973)
That Thing We Are Feeling is Covid-19 Fatigue
One of the most effective visual exercises I often use with my clients is to have them imagine that they are crossing a bridge to some future destination. It resonates with them as they are often in transition having left their most recent position or are contemplating leaving their current position to something new and different. The exercise can also be applied to relationships both at home and at work. Using the imagery of crossing a bridge can help them assess where they might be in a particular relationship and where they would like that relationship to be when they finish crossing that bridge. The destination is always that place where the client would ideally like to get to when they cross the bridge. The destination could be that new job, a better relationship, a physical move to an entirely new location, making a career pivot and perhaps even deciding to go back to school to either reskill or upskill, etc. And as we cross our own bridges toward whatever that desired future destination may be, there are some things that we know we can control by our own actions and there are those things which we absolutely have no control over despite our best efforts. Crossing the bridge to that desired destination can take on many forms. I can walk across the bridge. I could also choose to ride my bike, take an Uber, or hop on a bus. If I decide to drive my car across the bridge, I have the added ability to change lanes depending on how fast or slow I want to go in crossing my bridge. But crossing any bridge to the future takes time and requires lots of patience.
Crossing the Bridge is Taking Longer Than We Would Like
Crossing the bridge to the future has never been more challenging than it is today as we live through a global pandemic. Some of us have tested positive for the virus or know of someone in our flock who has gotten the virus or even died from it. We’ve had to continually adapt to being separated physically from loved ones, to embrace new daily protocols like washing our hands throughout the day, practicing social distancing, and wearing a mask when we are around others. We’ve had to cope with heightened levels of fear and anxiety as no one really knows for sure when a vaccine will be developed that will enable life to get back to some sense of the normal that our hearts are longing for. I believe that many of us are suffering from Covid-19 fatigue. For my wife and I, we can’t wait for that day when we finally cross our bridge to the future and visit our family members and friends who we’ve been physically separated from since the pandemic began; we can’t wait for that day to be able to hug our loved ones again and hold their hands; we can’t wait for that day where we can feel safe again and go to the movies and share some popcorn; or hop on a plane to that vacation spot we had always wanted to see or to attend that concert or Broadway musical. And now, as the virus rages on and more and more states are seeing rising positive tests, hospitalizations, and deaths, we find ourselves worrying about what it will be like in a couple of weeks when children and teachers head back to school.
Faith Will Help Us Cross the Bridge to Our Post Pandemic Future
My hunch is that many of you are feeling those same emotions as I am expressing here and like me you are wondering how much longer it will take to cross your own bridge to a future that is free of the pandemic. The great singer, composer, and Nobel Laureate Bob Dylan perfectly describes that loneliness and impatience we presently feel of being physically separated from our loved ones in a song entitled Tomorrow Is a Long Time.
“If today was not an endless highway. If tonight was not a crooked trailer. If tomorrow wasn’t just a long time, then lonesome would mean nothing to me at all.”
What has helped me throughout this challenging period is to share my emotions and experiences with others as it reinforces the notion that all of us need to be more patient and gentler with ourselves and others. Belonging to a men’s faith-based group like Men’s Cornerstone of St. Rose has been a great blessing where we share our experiences and walk of faith with one another including not only the many happy moments of our lives but also those difficult moments of struggle, separation, loss, and loneliness that are part of the faith journey itself.
In my own experience with Covid-19 fatigue and my impatient nature, I have found great comfort in listening to some beautiful music with inspirational lyrics as well as in reading some inspiring poetry like Rudyard Kipling’s classic If and that great line that seems particularly relevant during a pandemic “If you can wait and not be tired by waiting”. I have also found inner peace by imagining what that day will be like when I finally cross my own bridge to a post pandemic future. When I lie awake late at night, I visualize that moment when my wife and I will get out of our car and we can hug our daughter, son, son in law, and granddaughter again for the very first time since January 3rd and hold our grandson in our arms for the very first time since his birth in May. I imagine that moment next May when I can walk my other daughter down the aisle and give her hand in marriage to her fiancé and love of her life. I yearn for that day when I can bring the Holy Eucharist again to our homebound and to those parishioners living in assisted living and nursing home communities. I long for that day when I can be there for our parishioners who have not been able to fully grieve the loss of a loved one through our Parish Bereavement Group. And not a night goes by where you will not find me watching videos of the Camino and daydreaming about next July when I will finally arrive at the Cathedral of Santiago de Compostela to celebrate the completion of my 480-mile spiritual walk across Spain.
Yes, crossing my own bridge is going to take a longer time than I had planned on but in the words of a great song by the Ghanaian-Afro Pop group Osibisa called Woyaya, I know and I believe that “We will get there, heaven knows how we will get there. We know we will”. It will be hard we know, and the road will be muddy and rough, but we’ll get there, heaven knows how we will get there. We know we will. And, I also know instinctively that there is no turning back now. I am on the bridge to my future destination where my heart wants to take me. I must continue to move forward and cross that bridge with my eyes clearly fixed on the destination. And when that moment arises when I finally do cross the bridge to the post pandemic future that I long for, I’ll be singing that Van Morrison tune Full Force Gale with the sound blaring and yours truly joining Van in the refrain “No matter where I roam, I will find my way back home. I will always return to the Lord.”
Wishing all of my fellow coaches, clients, friends, and colleagues the very best as you cross the bridge to your post-pandemic future. Hang in there and don’t give up. You and I have made it this far. Woyaya folks — we will get there, I promise! And remember your 3 F’s — Have Faith, Treasure Family, Enjoy Friends!
Blessings to all, Dr. K
